I live in an apartment with my fiance and our 5 year old son. Not long after we moved into this apartment I started to become very depressed. We lived in the apartment above the one we do now for about a year, I have never been one to be depressed. I have always been on top of everything, very neat and organized, my son is my world. Since the day he was born I would take him for a long walk every day in the summer. I spent my whole day playing with him, taking him to the park, etc...
Not long after we moved downstairs I started to become very depressed, very slowly I just stopped doing my every day routine. It has gotten to a point where I will lay in bed all day, I have no energy or ambition to do anything more than what I have to do. My fiance has seen a very big change in me, he asks me all the time what the hell happened to me. I can't give him a good reason on why I have turned into the person I am today. No matter how much I try to shake the feeling of depression I can't. My doctor has put me on meds but they make my depression even worse so I stopped taking them.
I have a very hard time falling asleep and once I am woken up by something, I can't get back to sleep no matter how hard I try. My fiance gets up every morning at 5 am. Once that alarm goes off I am awake and can't get back to sleep. After a few months of moving in this apartment I would lay in bed and try to get back to sleep after being woken by the alarm clock. I would lay there and after a while I would feel what felt like someone was bouncing on my bed, so I would sit up but there was nothing there. Every time I lay back down the bouncing would start again, most of the time I would get up and go lay on the couch in the living room but as soon as I closed my eyes it started again. For months it was as if something was just taunting me, it never went any further than the bouncing. A few months ago I was laying in bed trying to get back to sleep, I lay in the same spot for about 20 minutes, I then rolled over. It was as if there was someone just watching me, and as soon as I rolled over I felt the thumping on my bed. It had been a while since the last time I had felt it so my first thought was that my dog was trying to get up on the bed. Our dog is only a puppy and at the time she had a hard time getting on the bed, so I thought it was her,, but I knew that my fiance put her in her cage when he left, so she wouldn't chew on things while I was sleeping. Her cage is to the left of my bed so I pushed myself up and went to turn my head to see if she was in her cage, but before I was able to turn my head I was attacked. I was pushed face first into my pillow, I couldn't move or speak. This experience was as if I was dreaming. I heard a woman say my name in a scratchy voice, I couldn't see her face just her arms and body, she lifted me up in the air, however I was not in my bedroom anymore, I was in my living room. The women told me in these exact words, "Noel I can pick you up and slam you down." I was scared to death begging her to put me down. This lasted only a few minutes and before I knew it I was back in my bed. I sat up and looked around my room, I looked at my sheets and blanket to see if they were pulled off my bed, but everything was just as it should have been. My dog was in her cage whining like she was scared of whatever was in my room. I know I was not sleeping before this had happened, so I wonder if a spirit is able to show you what they can do to you by making you think it's a dream. I have never been so scared in my life.
After we moved into this apartment our landlord told us that his mother died in our living room. That morning I called him and asked him what his mother sounded like, what she died from, and if she was depressed before she died. He described her voice and I knew right then that it was her talking to me. He also told me she died of lung cancer, which would explain the scratchy voice. He also told me she was very sad and depressed before she died, she was very ill from the chemo. So I now wonder if her presence is in this house, and I am picking up on how she felt before she died. I don't know if it's possible for that to happen and wondering if anyone has ever experienced anything like this. I know that I was not sleeping when she attacked me, I had gotten up that morning to make my fiance's lunch while he was getting ready for work, before I went back to bed and tried to fall asleep. Since then I have felt her pin me down but nothing like what I just described. I have learned to just let it happen and wait for it to pass. Sometimes I wonder if a spirit can sense your fear and feed off it, so I am not afraid anymore. If anyone has ever experienced this please let me know. Please feel free to contact me